What Pulls Your Trigger?

My list of triggers is longer than the piece of paper I wrote them on. I’d imagine there are even triggers I have yet to uncover. I want to talk about this because as I progress on this sobriety wagon I have encountered moments where not only did I want to fall off this wagon, but actually deconstruct it so I never have to ride the fucking thing again. I have filled my wagon with so many excuses I am surprised to see it still sitting at my front door the next morning. Luckily, this wagon is my higher being … Continue reading What Pulls Your Trigger?

Why This Blog?

I ask myself this question every time I attempt to write one. I know there is a reason. I know there is a point. It came about because my life, like so many others, has been one of substance abuse, excessive drinking, smoking weed, cigarettes and very good parties. All surrounded by some of the most epic people on the planet. I once played glow in the dark bocce ball on Ketamine somewhere in NZ. I’ve danced with the stars on acid, I’ve done blow off pretty much any surface you can imagine. I started young. Probably why the industry … Continue reading Why This Blog?

Do You Just Give Up?

I sure did. Whether I gave up on sobriety, writing this blog, a relationship, a gym membership or even something as simple as learning to cook. I kept consistently giving up. My life experience, up until last year, had been fueled and lavished in a dream world of substances within the restaurant industry. I coasted through my career in an industry that accepted my behavior, or so it seemed. I never took anything seriously, I just drifted. So when it comes to “giving up”, the big one was getting and staying sober. Tried those shoes on so many times I … Continue reading Do You Just Give Up?

I Believe in You.

I wrote this quite sometime ago, but could not pass up sharing. I Believe in You – Kimberly  I wonder what it would be like to live a life free of pain and suffering. Free from addiction and self destruction. A life lived only of self worth. Self gratitude. None of this self sabotage. This constant battle of identities. I wonder how it would feel to live in complete freedom. This is my journey along the path to a free, prosperous, healthy, conscious being. I would like to share my story with you. The little girl who was neglected and … Continue reading I Believe in You.

Lets Start by Being Honest with Ourselves.

As an addict we willingly give in to that “voice” in our mind that reassures us, this time it’s going to be okay, this time it’s different. What’s a couple drinks, a laugh, a few bumps. I got this. This time it’s different….. Hours later that same “voice” tells you how stupid and fucked up you are. What a mess you’ve made of your life. Worthless. It promises you it is the last time…. Saying No.Alright, now we’re aware. Our lives are not being fulfilled with a bottle of Jameson, 6 lagers and a gram of Cauchi. I discovered first … Continue reading Lets Start by Being Honest with Ourselves.